Wednesday, October 27, 2004
~ 10/27/2004 04:09:00 pm ~

good luck to all..... for tomorrow biology practical paper......
Sunday, October 24, 2004
~ 10/24/2004 07:59:00 pm ~

today i am happy.... like fluttering butterflies... even though today's weather did not seems quite good.... i feel like i am fluttering in the sun like dancing.... hee hee
Saturday, October 23, 2004
~ 10/23/2004 09:41:00 pm ~
hee hee... today i went to malaysia for a shopping trip...i bought a bag,a dress,hair thingie,cosmetics............. and went there to eat lots of stuff....... hee hee... today feel so good........ i better keep it up.............. talk to shawn for two hours again hee hee... we are friends.... shawn is being pester by two bugger who keeps on buzzing in her ears.... i hopre that they will be kill by pesticide soon or else i will also be crazy soon listening to the buzz everyday.......... hope they buzz off soon......
Friday, October 22, 2004
~ 10/22/2004 07:38:00 pm ~
Boring............ today's physics lesson is really boring............
DANCING IS THE BEST!!!!!!!!!!! HIP-HOP FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
shawn and i was late today.... actually we can be on time but we ... hee hee you know......
Thursday, October 21, 2004
~ 10/21/2004 10:31:00 pm ~
*crying* i cannot finish the paper today... and my reading and observation sux....... today's paper i am dead.....hee hee... dancing is still the best thing ever............
Wednesday, October 20, 2004
~ 10/20/2004 09:51:00 pm ~
tomorrow chemistry practical.... even that i am quite ok with it... but i am still scared that i will do something wrong..... i am scared that i will fail it... i am scared that my readings is wrong, my observation is wrong... i am scared that i cannot finish the paper.... omg.... is getting even more scary every minutes...............
Tuesday, October 19, 2004
~ 10/19/2004 07:03:00 pm ~
hey! today i found a temporary medicine for the poison in me.... DANCE!!! i think that dancing help me to control the sadness in me... when i am dancing i feel that i do not need to think about anything else that bothers me..... when i am dancing i feel happy ang also i can release stress,worries,sadness,fear and forget about studies... hee hee... i foung out that shawn like dancing too and also singing.....
Monday, October 18, 2004
~ 10/18/2004 07:53:00 pm ~
although today i feel slightly happy... but i does not last long... then i found out that happiness did not last long in me at all... when this happen ... i really have no idea... i really need to find the andidote soon or else i will die of sadness poison..... now is like i am at the point where the poison is acting almost every moment.....
Sunday, October 17, 2004
~ 10/17/2004 09:45:00 pm ~
maybe dark is my weak point.... i always like the bright morning..... but i like to look at the night sky too but why ............ why this fear of darkness have to come to me.... now even though i still like the night sky a lot ... i have to find someone to be at my side as whem complete darkness falls upon me i think i will scream out all my soul... i am scared... but even so i still will not give up the beautiful nght sky..... i think this is the only thing i will try to do......
Saturday, October 16, 2004
~ 10/16/2004 11:58:00 pm ~

why is the angel of the dark keep haunting me......? why must she made me fear the dark......? WHY?
Friday, October 15, 2004
~ 10/15/2004 08:50:00 pm ~
today is graduation day for us... i seems to be happy on the outside but still scared and depress in the inside... i am touched by the words the teachers said to us... i don know if i will be sad leaving the school.... i really don know... sad memories and a lot of things that have happen.... i really don know....
Thursday, October 14, 2004
~ 10/14/2004 10:26:00 pm ~
friends? family? care? concern? why are you when i need ?...... why am i having the feeling ? why? why? why? can someone answer me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wednesday, October 13, 2004
~ 10/13/2004 11:21:00 pm ~
today i feel a bit better but still scared of sleeping in the dark..... the night seems to be getting more errie by the days.... what have gotten into me... i am not sure of me ... myself.... am i getting crazy.... or am i getting mad???
Tuesday, October 12, 2004
~ 10/12/2004 06:19:00 pm ~

i still cannot stop feeling sad!!!!
Monday, October 11, 2004
~ 10/11/2004 06:13:00 pm ~
i really need the feeling of being needed again...... now i am only left with an empty shell.... this few night... i cannot sleep... i am scared... til i cry.... how? i cut myself to distract the fear but pain can only last for a while.... CAN SOMEONE TELL ME WHAT AM I SUPPOSE TO DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sunday, October 10, 2004
~ 10/10/2004 06:06:00 pm ~
i still feel sad...... i felt that i am left out... i felt that my friends doesnt need me any more... as the exams is round the corner...... i don know i only know that i feel abandon by everyone around me.... am i so bad or everyone around me look down on me????
Saturday, October 09, 2004
~ 10/09/2004 05:45:00 pm ~

i feel lonely..... and extreme sadness.....
Friday, October 08, 2004
~ 10/08/2004 11:19:00 pm ~
my nightmare from the past is back again to haunt me... i am trying to control myself but i can't.... i am trying very hard not to hurt myself and don stress myself up by thinking so much about it..... but the fear have already take over me mentally and physically.... i am scared of the feeling of being left alone... now i am really scared when i am alone in the dark... i feel that no one acompany me to go through the darkest moment in my live.... when i am alone in the dark i feel like i will be kill or dump aside... i try to cut myself so that the pain can let me stop thinking about those scary stuff but it is not enough.... when i am studying at night... i try listening to music but i still cannot control my fear ... i cried... when i am alone my heart tells me that everyone despise me everyone in the world look down on me... i always think that they are talking about me behind my back... everyone is looking at me seeing how i fall... i don know why... i just feel lonely..... this kind of feeling is wat i feel once in my primary school daysit is coming back again... i feel that around me there is a lot of people don like me....
Thursday, October 07, 2004
~ 10/07/2004 11:33:00 pm ~
today i am soooooo happy!!!!!!!!!!! today is my birthday!!! shawn treated me to seoul garden with karen and clement...... happy birthday to me!!!!